Dear Child
We hear you. Every day, we listen to your world – the things you say, and the things you don’t. We are on alert, listening and attuned trying to anticipate and respond. We know you; we see you and we hear you sweet child.
We know the seams in your socks are unbearable. They feel like tiny wires pressing against your toes, even though we can’t feel them ourselves. How can we help? Let’s try new socks. You don’t like them? OK, we’ll look for something else.
We see how hard it is for you to fall asleep. How can we make it easier? Should we lie with you until your breathing slows? Would you like a story? You want us to sleep here, in your room? That’s OK. We’ll do that for you. Let me stroke your head and calm your mind.
You don’t like your tea—it’s too lumpy, too hot, too cold. The beans are touching the sausage, and that just won’t work. That’s OK. Let us start over so you can eat.
I know you didn’t mean to hurt us with your words. The world just became a little too much for you. We’re sorry we cried, it’s OK. We love you.
We know the world feels overwhelming, and we’re doing everything we can to make it manageable for you. Every question, every adjustment, every new attempt is because we love you. You are worth it, always. You are not broken, sweet child. You are amazingly you and we know you, we see you and we hear you.
With all our love,
Your parents
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Dear SEN Parent
We hear you. Every day, we listen to your world – the things you say, and the things you don’t. We are on alert, listening and attuned trying to anticipate and respond. We know you; we see you and we hear you sweet parent.
You are tired.
You are tired because you stay awake long after they’ve fallen asleep, worrying if you are doing enough, wondering if you’ve done the right thing. You are tired because you’ve spent hours researching socks, meals, sensory tools, therapies, and everything else that might make your child’s life easier. You are tired because your child’s needs – your beautiful, complex, and amazing child’s needs—are endless. And you will do everything in your power to support them.
They are your world.
But your world needs you to stay strong, and sometimes you forget that. Sometimes you pour so much into helping your child regulate their nervous system that you forget about your own. And that’s not fair – you deserve to be you because you matter, and you are amazing.
So, wonderful SEN parent, make this promise to yourself today: keep showing up, every day, to hear your child and help them. But also take care of yourself, so you can be the best parent but also be the best you.
Sometimes that might mean asking for help or taking a moment to rest. It might mean a walk in the fresh air or a cup of tea in the quiet. It might be picking up your journal and filling the pages with your thoughts and worries to release them and move on. It might mean reminding yourself that it’s OK to take a break, not because you don’t love your child, but because I do.
Parents are important, too. We are the foundations of our children’s world, and strong foundations make for strong homes.
You are not broken, sweet SEN parent, you are tired. We know you, we see you and we hear you.
We care about you, and we’re here for you, always.
With all our love,
SEN Parent Support Group
